Episode 18: Consent
WARNING: This episode contains descriptions of consent violations both factual and fictitious.
Today Adam and Craig delve into the ins and outs of Consent and kink and BDSM play. From the basics of pre play negotiation and continued consent to more advanced topics and unique issues with consent in kink and BDSM play.
Basic consent ideas
How to have a Pre scene discussion
What’s the difference between hard limits and soft limits
Be ready to clearly set ideas, don’t be vague
Talk about the reasons behind your limits, don’t just give a laundry list.
Absence of no isn’t the same as yes. The ‘enthusiastic yes’ concept
Explain the concept of Continued consent
Ongoing discussions in a scene. Both the tops and bottoms responsibility
The traffic light system
Advanced consent ideas
Dangers of shifting limits in subspace
Dangers of going nonverbal
Playing without a safeword
Implicit expectations of play spaces, darkrooms/orgy rooms ect, knowing the space.
Clear ways to give nonverbal consent
Clear ways to show nonverbal refusal of Consent
How to protect yourself
The difficulty with grey areas of consent
Violation without a deliberate violator
Our thoughts on how to handle these events as a sub
Our thoughts on how to handle events if you’re the top in question
The concept of rashomon in conflict
For further exploration of these issues and concepts, I highly recommend these episodes of Graydancer’s Ropecast
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